IN THIS ISSUE:
 
I. The Importance of Self Care
II. Five Quick Tips
III. News You Can Use
IV. References

I. THE IMPORTANCE OF SELF CARE

I am writing this while my husband is undergoing what will be many hours of major dental surgery. I admit I was a bit "beside myself" not knowing what I was going to do during his time in the dental chair. I did bring work along, a book I’m reading and some other potential distractions, but now none of them seems to be up to the task of keeping me preoccupied during this time.

After today’s surgical ordeal is over, we’ll head back home where I’ll be taking care of him for a while, making sure he gets his medicine and some sort of liquid nourishment, the only kind he’ll be able to have for the next week or so, on a regular basis. Everybody’s a little different under these circumstances, and we don’t know how long my caretaker role might last. These hours, however, might be the only time-out I have for the next few days, so I decided this would be a great time for me to do some extra caretaking of myself.

Making sure they had both our cell phone numbers (his in one of my pockets, mine in the other), I left the dental office and headed for one of my very favorite restaurant, delicatessen and bakeries in San Diego, D.Z. Akin’s. How nice it is to just sit here and have this quiet time. I’m enjoying a cup of soothing herbal tea and, of course, anticipating the arrival of my cheese blintzes! I realize even more now what a comforting gift this is to give myself. And with Chuck being under the weather for the next week or so, it gives me a great excuse to pick up a large quantity of their tasty chicken soup to go!

Self care seems to generally be thought of as something we can put off and assume that there will be time later on to give ourselves a treat or take a break. While I practice regular self care as a daily part of my life with morning yoga, healthy eating and an evening swim, today is a little different. Today I gave myself permission to leave the cold, somewhat stuffy waiting room of the dental office and go to a place I rarely get to because of its distance from where we live. I'm taking time to enjoy being alone, eating whatever I want and writing my thoughts – bliss.

I don't know why I originally thought I should either stay in the waiting room close to my husband’s ordeal and get some work done. Was it trying to demonstrate compassion and support? Was it guilt? Did I think I should try to match his serious situation with some serious activity on my part? My best friend Val had said if it had been her, she would have found her way down to the mall to browse the stores – her idea of bliss. Plus, I knew my husband would strongly support me in my desire to wait for him however and wherever I chose.

When was the last time you gave yourself a time-out treat, and guilt-free at that? Are you taking care of your own self care on a daily basis? If not, I suggest it's important we establish habits of allowing and giving ourselves daily care and time-out treats on a regular basis now. We don’t always know when we’ll be called on to provide extra care for someone else. If your self-care habits are already in place, it’s a bit easier and less stressful to provide quality needed care to another.

Speaking of attention, the hot blintzes have arrived so it’s time for me to give them some attention!

Yum,

Linda

PS Don’t forget to floss your teeth!

1. Be careful not to take on other people's suffering and pain as if it were your own. Healthy self-involvement is not selfishness.
2. Make sure you have daily self-care habits in place. And remember, if you are adding new self-care activities, it takes 30 days or so to establish new habits in your life.
3. Be sure your regular self-care habits include caretaking of your physical body. When was the last time you made a visit to the dentist or the doctor for a wellness check?
4. Create a list of possible self-care treats. Is it reading a good book by the fireplace, visiting your favorite restaurant, going to the park, or maybe a massage?
5. Don't let guilt derail valuable moments you have dedicated for yourself.
Being a good caregiver to yourself first is the only way you're going to be of value as a caretaker for another.

III. NEWS YOU CAN USE

Coming soon is my new company, The New Virtual Reality Self-Help Center, www.vrselfhelp.com. There you can join others who want to be, or already are, active participants in their own mental health care.

An initial "test drive" will probably be yet another month or so away. However, we’re very excited about the programs and quality of information we have been gathering so far. There will many free programs, products, pertinent information and articles. We will even have some items available in Spanish!

Here’s an early look at some of our program titles: "Dare to Create Love, Health & Money," "The ‘Write’ Way to Healthy Living," "Being a Tortoise in A World of Hares: Getting Ahead at Your Own Pace," "Resist Exercising? Want to Know Why?" and "Boosting Your Wellness Factor."

Sign up to be notified when we launch by sending an email directly to info@vrselfhelp.com with "Sign-up" in the Subject Line. You can also sign up at www.vrselfhelp.com, however make sure you reply to the confirmation email or you won't be registered in our system. If you tried to sign up in the past but have never gotten a confirmation email or update email, please send an email to info@vrselfhelp.com with "Sign-up Help" in the Subject Line.

I look forward to seeing you soon – virtually!
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"Stressed souls need the reassuring rhythm of self-nurturing rituals."
- Sarah Ban Breathnach, "Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy" by Sarah Ban Breathnach
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Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy by Sarah Ban Breathnach (Room 1 – Define Simplifying Your Life - http://www.simplifylife.com/stratgy1.html)

Daily thoughts and insights on getting in touch with your authentic self. This practical, inspirational daily guide provides a meditation or exercise for every day of the year to help pare down our lives and clear through mental clutter. Breathnach's Daybook features 366 essays penned from a woman's perspective.

Don't Sweat The Small Stuff and it's All Small Stuff by Richard Carlson, Ph.D.
(Room 2 – Toss Your Tolerations - http://www.simplifylife.com/stratgy2.html)

"Simple ways to keep the small things from taking over your life," Carlson’s handbook reveals 100 ways to calm down in the midst of your incredibly hurried, stress-filled life.

MORE ABOUT "MAKING LIVES SIMPLER"

Linda Manassee Buell is a full-time Personal and Business Coach, and author of the tips eBooklet, "Simplify Your Life, 101 Ways to Create the Life You Love," the audiotape, "Simplify Your Life, 7 Simple Strategies for Doing What You Love to Do," the revised edition of the workbook, "Simplify Your Life: A Journey of Personal Discovery," and her latest book, "Panic and Anxiety Disorder, 121 Tips, Real-life Advice, Resources & More."

To order your personal copy of any of the above by check or credit card, just go to http://simplifylife.com and click on "Shop the Store."

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The contents herein are solely the opinions of Simplify Life and Linda Manassee Buell.