IN THIS ISSUE:
 
I. Setting Your Boundaries
II. Five Quick Tips
III. References

My coach tells me I can't have it all, but I don't know if I quite agree. I know that I do want to have a successful and fun business and still have quality time to spend with my husband, personal time just for me and extra time just for good measure. I like working hard and creating as much as I like relaxing and reading a good novel. I like sharing ideas and building businesses just as much as I like kicking back and watching a favorite TV show. I like having a full, self-designed schedule. This is my personal definition of "having it all."

What I don't ever want again is the "all" I used to have ú an all-too-busy, all-too-hectic life complete with complaints, stress, exhaustion and never-ending demands on my time. I don't want to be where I face a consistent challenge trying to juggle medical, business, recreational, cultural and personal time. I do want time with my family and time to enjoy the other essential things in my life.

If yours is a hectic life, it might be that the promises you constantly try to make to others have gotten out of control. It might be a loss of clarity around the essential things you truly want in your life. It might be that you’re living from other people's expectations rather than your own desires.
If this is true for you, understanding that you do have more control than you may now believe is the first step in turning it around. Checking and establishing your boundaries to determine what people can and cannot do around you is the second. These actions are tools that will help you clarify your desires.

One way I use boundaries as a business owner is to have very specific times for when I work and when I don't. I keep both my work schedule and personal schedule on one calendar. Then if I receive a call from a potential new client who wants to talk during my scheduled personal time, for instance, I tell them that I'm not available at that particular time, and suggest another time during my work schedule that is more convenient for both of us.

My coaching clients and friends offer other examples. Tammy set boundaries with her boss by letting her know that she has a family and must leave the office at a certain time on certain days to meet personal obligations such as school commitments. Becky set boundaries about when her employees could feel free to walk into her office unannounced and when they need to respect her closed-door times. Jane set boundaries with her employer by asking for more vacation time during her kid's summer vacation from school. Diane set boundaries with her son over when and how he should exercise his responsibility of cleaning his room.

Boundaries help you stop reacting to everyone else's expectations and start living by your own. You aren't being demanding of anyone else, you’re simply taking control of your own life. You’re choosing more effective choices and better using your most precious resource ú you.

Make use of the tool of setting boundaries and you can start transforming your experience of a hectic life to a life that is a more stress-free and full life.

Linda

1. Clarify the essential things you want in your life. Remember to look at all aspects of your personal and work lives.
2. Look for parts of your life where you’re yielding control of your time and space to others. Determine what boundaries you can put in place in these areas.
3. Know that it’s up to you to set boundaries, and give yourself permission to have control of your own life. Acknowledge and experience the strength and energy boundaries give you.
4. Learn the language of boundaries and how to frame and ask for what you need and want.
5. Say "no" to a burned-out and stressed-out, hectic life. Say "yes" to living a complete and fulfilling life every day.

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"As a principle-centered person you try to stand apart from the emotion of the situation and from other factors that would act on you, and evaluate the options. Looking at the balanced whole--the work needs, the family needs, the other needs that may be involved, and the possible implications of the various alternatives--you'll try to come up with the best solution taking all factors into consideration."
- Stephen Covey, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
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III. REFERENCES

To find more resources or to order these, go to
http://www.simplifylife.com/reference.html

Take Time for Your Life: A Personal Coach's Seven-Step Program for Creating the Life You Want by Cheryl Richardson

(Room 5 ú Create A Life Changing Plan - http://www.simplifylife.com/stratgy5.html)
Cheryl Richardson, a personal life coach and frequent guest on the Oprah show, helps people create the lives they want. In Take Time for Your Life, she shows you how to switch from being stressed, unfulfilled, and overworked, to "living a life you love" by using a seven-step process.

7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey
(Room 8 ú Additional References of Interest - http://www.simplifylife.com/readmore.html)

This is the best-selling guide to personal fulfillment and professional success. Guided by Covey's remarkable step-by-step program, readers will find more meaning and satisfaction in relationships, be better able to achieve personal and professional goals--and can look forward to lasting happiness and success.

MORE ABOUT "MAKING LIVES SIMPLER"

Linda Manassee Buell is a full-time Personal and Business Coach, and author of the tips eBooklet, "Simplify Your Life, 101 Ways to Create the Life You Love," the audiotape, "Simplify Your Life, 7 Simple Strategies for Doing What You Love to Do," the revised edition of the workbook, "Simplify Your Life: A Journey of Personal Discovery," and her latest book, "Panic and Anxiety Disorder: 121 Tips, Real-life Advice, Resources & More."

To order your personal copy of any of the above by check or credit card, just go to http://simplifylife.com and click on "Shop the Store."
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The contents herein are solely the opinions of Simplify Life and Linda Manassee Buell.